Take Heart and Manage Stress is by Kelly Hassett of MedCOR Professionals.

February has been nicknamed “Heart Month” not only because of Valentine’s Day, but because the American Heart Association has been celebrating National Wear Red Day in February for the last 10 years. For everyone, but especially children of Baby Boomers who find themselves in the difficult position of working full-time while caring for aging parents, growing children and possibly even grandchildren, February is the perfect month to take stock and figure out better ways manage stress in everyday life.

If you are aged 35 – 54, you’re officially part of the “Sandwich Generation.” According to the American Psychological Association, “Nearly 40 percent of those aged 35 -54 report extreme levels of stress…not only on personal relationships…but also on their own well-being as they struggle to take better care of themselves.” This problem is a catch-22; caring for both children and parents while managing the responsibilities of everyday life can be stressful. This stress makes it difficult to handle responsibilities, which in turn, causes more stress.

Best Way to Manage Stress

The best way to manage stress is two fold. First, make time for yourself so you have the mental and physical energy to care for your loved ones. Second, get up and move. Take a walk, practice yoga, play softball or do whatever physical activity makes you happy.

If your schedule doesn’t allow you to join a gym, it may be time to invest in workout equipment for your home. Set aside a small space and visit your local equipment supplier. Consider a treadmill, an elliptical trainer, stationary cycle or a set of weights. Qualified specialists will not only sell you the equipment, they will teach you the best way to use it, and they’ll be there to answer questions even after the equipment is delivered to your home.

Yes, caring for loved ones can be challenging, but it is also life affirming, and “Heart Month” is the perfect time to improve the way you manage stress. After all, the memories you create today are the ones you’ll have for the rest of your life.

Worry and anxiety self-help tip #1: Accept uncertainty

The inability to tolerate uncertainty plays a huge role in anxiety and worry. Chronic worriers can’t stand doubt or unpredictability. They need to know with 100 percent certainty what’s going to happen. Worrying is seen as a way to predict what the future has in store, a way to prevent unpleasant surprises and control the outcome. The problem is, it doesn’t work.

Thinking about all the things that could go wrong doesn’t make life any more predictable. You may feel safer when you’re worrying, but it’s just an illusion. Focusing on worst-case scenarios won’t keep bad things from happening. It will only keep you from enjoying the good things you have in the present. So if you want to stop worrying, start by tackling your need for certainty and immediate answers.

Worry and anxiety self-help tip #2: Create a worry period

It’s tough to be productive in your daily life when anxiety and worry are dominating your thoughts. Trying to stop worrying doesn’t work–at least not for long. You can distract yourself for a moment, but you can’t banish your anxious thoughts for good. Trying to do so often makes them stronger. But that doesn’t mean there’s nothing you can do to control your worry. You just need to try a different approach. Rather than trying to totally suppress an anxious thought, develop the habit of postponing worrying.

Learning to postpone worrying:

• Create a “worry period.” Choose a set time and place for worrying. It should be the same every day (e.g. In the living room from 5:00 to 5:20 p.m.) and early enough that it won’t make you anxious right before bedtime. During your worry period, you’re allowed to worry about whatever’s on your mind. The rest of the day, however, is a worry-free zone.
• Postpone your worry. If an anxious thought or worry comes into your head during the day, make a brief note of it on paper and postpone it to your worry period. Remind yourself that you’ll have time to think about it later, so there’s no need to worry about it right now. Save it for later and continue to go about your day.
• Go over your “worry list” during the worry period. Reflect on the worries you wrote down during the day. If the thoughts are still bothering you, allow yourself to worry about them, but only for the amount of time you’ve specified for your worry period. If the worries don’t seem important any more, cut your worry period short and enjoy the rest of your day.

Postponing worrying is effective because it breaks the habit of dwelling on worries in the present moment. As you develop the ability to postpone your anxious thoughts, you’ll experience a greater sense of control.

Worry and anxiety self-help tip #3: Challenge negative thoughts

If you suffer from chronic anxiety and worries, chances are you look at the world in ways that make it seem more dangerous than it really is. For example, you may overestimate the possibility that things will turn out badly, jump immediately to worst-case scenarios, or treat every negative thought as if it were fact. You may also discredit your own ability to handle life’s problems, assuming you’ll fall apart at the first sign of trouble. These irrational, pessimistic attitudes are known as cognitive distortions.

Although cognitive distortions aren’t based on reality, they’re not easy to give up. Often, they’re part of a lifelong pattern of thinking that’s become so automatic you’re not even completely aware of it. In order to break these bad thinking habits and stop the worry and anxiety they bring – you must retrain your brain.

Start by identifying the frightening thought, being as detailed as possible about what scares or worries you. Then, instead of viewing your thoughts as facts, treat them as hypotheses you’re testing out. As you examine and challenge your worries and fears, you’ll develop a more balanced perspective.

Stop worry by questioning the worried thought:

• What’s the evidence that the thought is true? That it’s not true?
• Is there a more positive, realistic way of looking at the situation?
• What’s the probability that what I’m scared of will actually happen?
• If the probability is low, what are some more likely outcomes?
• Is the thought helpful? How will worrying about it help me and how will it hurt me?
• What would I say to a friend who had this worry?

Reprinted with permission for personal or non-profit use. Visit www.helpguide.org to see the article with links to related articles.  This material is for information and support; not a substitute for professional advice.

We hear it on the news all of the time – families just do not sit down and eat together anymore.  Our hurried lifestyles are getting in the way of quality time with our families at the dinner table.  While it is important to have a sit-down meal with your children, it is equally as important to have frequent sit-down meals with your aging parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and friends.

Seniors who eat alone have a higher chance of becoming under- or malnourished.  They often do not eat a proper diet or enough of the foods provided for them.  That is why it is important to slow down, sit a while, enjoy the meal, and have a good conversation with the senior in your life.  Not only will companionship at the dinner table make mealtime more enjoyable for seniors, but it can also stimulate appetite—helping to insure they get proper nutrition for good health and independence.

In addition to sitting down and eating with seniors, preparing a meal can be just as important. When you prepare a meal together, you also provide your loved one mental stimulation that is essential to health and independence—as you strengthen your bond together. This time together also provides the opportunity to observe how the senior is getting along and if he or she may need additional help around the house.

The professional caregivers of Comfort Keepers^® do all of these things, providing this same type of stimulation to seniors through Interactive Caregiving™, our unique system of care that engages seniors mentally, physically, socially and emotionally to improve their quality of life.

Here are a few more tips to help make mealtime for your loved one more enjoyable:

• For a senior who has difficulty cooking, prepare foods in quantity and package them in appropriately-sized portions to freeze and eat later.  Keep a list of what is in the freezer or refrigerator on the door; it is easier to plan a meal when your loved one knows what he or she has available
• Take a senior grocery shopping to help him or her make well-balanced, nutritionally-rich purchases
• Coordinate a neighbor or friend for the senior to eat with on a regular basis, if you are unavailable
• Make sure seniors have a comfortable place to eat; set out a nice placemat and linen napkin, or fresh flowers
• Help the senior to join or start a potluck dinner club with friends

You may not always be able to provide meal companionship to a senior in your life, but helping find friends to eat with them, assisting in preparing meals, or providing a caregiver like a Comfort Keeper^® to shop, prepare meals, and eat with your senior, can help your loved one stay healthy and nourished.